Loving some one is considering him or her of value.
Any thing that we consider of value, we spend time with it.
Any thing that we spend time with, we start to know it more.
The more we know it more, the more we begin to accept it.
If you say I love my children, only ask how much time I do spend with them.
Do not let it drop to less than full 5 hours of quality time with your kids and that is for working fathers and mothers.
Others can spend more…..but do not forget to ignore the balance, coz balance is another act of love !
Loving some one is considering him or her of value.
We have a capability so unique that it lets us stand apart from the rest of animal kingdom. We can imagine ourselves as separate from our thoughts.
Try doing this. Imagine, that you are watching yourself from the other corner of the room. Now further imagine that you are watching your imagined “” image”” from outside the window. You are watching yourself watching yourself.
We two went to Pir Sohawa. It was a climb up hill.
It was sunny and yet crisp. The early hours sun of the day was rising and air was starting to warm up.
We left the restaurants and the rush spots behind and kept on moving on the other side of the hill where silence resided.
On a lonely clearing on grass and a few stones around, we sat there. Tired. Exhausted. We smiled at each other and had water and then citrus from my shoulder bag since I was the one carrying it.
It started to breeze. Wind was picking up.
A little cold whiff of wind mixed with warmer patches. All the city down below was before our eyes.
Her hair locks rose and fell occasionally with every little stronger gush of wind.
We could hear the birds without any city noise in the background.
I wanted to say something. But I did not know what to say.
I said: I do not know what to say. She put her hand on mine: “Then say nothing”!
I realized that to enjoy old friendships, you dont have to say things.
is the study of anything that is intrigued and loved by wisdom !
There are nearly 6.98 billion people living on Earth as of now. To this date, how many people have been born and died can be another staggering number, perhaps several times more than that.
The question is why you were born as an another soul? Why did the invisible hand sent you to this blue planet? You can call it God, Jesus, Allah, Raam, Om or whatever who sent you here but the fact is you were sent here and you would leave this place at some point in time. The question is thus why your soul was created and you were sent here? And if now you are here, why are you here?
Just take out a few minutes of your time to seriously think on it?
1. There was a gap that only you could fulfill.
2. That gap would require some thing e.g. a talent, a skill, a creative process, a service, a contribution that only you were able to do or to make.
3. If there were other people who could exactly do the same, then there were no need to send you for doing the same job. As we all know its stupid to designate the same job to more than a person, would not the intelligence and divine wisdom spread across the universe know this fact.
Thinking and pondering on the above three points may lead you to a feeling of Eureka about the most important pheonomenon in your life: you.
Why is your purpose important? Every thing has a reason to be. It is in our built in nature to do things for a cause. This is shown from our every day experiences of handling things and spending routines to our life long aims. We hate wandering around for no reason. Leaving a room and being asked where are you going, if we do not know where and we answer the same, we shall be considered insane.
For most of us we do things for a cause in a hierarchy. We learn things to earn and enjoy a good life. We earn because we want to have more comfort for ourselves, our families and those whom we love. We want to have things and activities done in a hierarchy.
Understanding the hierarchy is important. We need oxygen to breathe. The second most important need is of water. Then comes food. Then comes the comfort or maintaining a suitable temperature for our bodies which includes the need for clothing and shelter. Then lies the need of being loved and being intimate i.e. of touching and being touched, of hugging and making love. Then is the need of contribution; to give back what we have received. At the final top is the need for spirituality.
This hierarchy has been addressed in different manners of arrangement by several authors.
Spending real time to find out the real purpose of our life is addressing the top most need first. Knowing it and then weaving your path towards it step by step. This principle is quite highlighted by Stephen R. Covey in his work The Seven Habits and he has termed it Begin with End in Mind. To decide the final outcome first and then gradually work towards it and on our way keep addressing the needs as they need to be met.
What happens to us that we are addressed in the intermediary needs of comforting our bodies and egos so much that we never make it to the top. Most of us are caught up in a frenzy of gadgets, digital toys, cell phones, laptops, cars, devices, jewelleries and wearing apparel, dining and cuisines that we in fact lose sight of the final goal: our mental and spiritual development.
Efforting to know and finding out our entire purpose of being does not let us go lost. We do not end up confused some where in the middle before reaching our goals.
Knowing our entire purpose of life makes us stand in the elite of the elites. This elite group is nobler than any other elite group formed cause of possessions or financial status, since this can never be taken away from us.
Shall you choose to be in the super elite?
Being able to truly love ourselves involves delaying gratification.
This can be best explained by the experiment conducted with children aged 4 to 6 at Stanford University in 1972. They were offered marshmallows on a condition. Those children who would eat it right now, would get only one. Those who would chose to eat 30 minutes later would get two. Those who would choose to eat after an hour would get three.
Majority of the children chose to eat now. A little less opted for half an hour wait and further less number of children opted to wait for a full hour.
Years later studying the careers of the children, was discovered that those who were able to delay or defer the gratification had achieved a significantly higher level of success in their career.
Delaying gratification would thus mean postponing instant relief and joy for a much higher cause.
One of the disciples of Buddha and a great Master of Zen, was asked what was it that calmness radiated out of him and he was always full of joy.
Replied he:” I eat rice when I am hungry and I sleep when I feel sleepy ! ”
“We all do that as well”, his student said.
“No, No.. when you eat , you think of this and that; and when you sleep you think of this and that.”
“When I sleep, I sleep and when I eat I only eat ” , the Master said.
Miracles are outcome of thought process transformed into belief in three stages.
He was known as the Maestro and is still known as the same. I have met people from seven nations and in each, people knew him, adored him, loved him and even worshipped him. He spent his whole life into what he loved. He did it so marvelously that he became his work. He became his music. Today, internationally people know Qawali through one name: Ustaad Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan.
Our kids need our vigilance, much more on what they are getting to observe and learn than what they are getting to eat !