The tools of love are in fact the tools for change. We can not bring about any change, with in ourselves or around us, unless it is genuinely backed up by love.
Love is the will to grow ourselves spiritually and mentally. Thus to start loving some one begins with loving ourselves first.
Through out my writings, when ever I have used the word love, I have used it with the four senses and meanings or tools which it contains. I therefore am not referring to the love from romance literature or Holly Wood movies when I speak of love.
We grow ourselves through the four tools of love. Love is the energy with which we use the following four tools in our lives.
Thus if any of the four tools is absent, we can question the genuineness of love. In a sense, these can also be called the 4 test signs of love!
Thus to change your self to a higher level, follow the four simple themes. They are not new. They are perhaps as old as the humanity. The key, however is to follow them in total and absolute commitment to yourself to change.
I promise you would change because I have.
The First Tool:
To love ourselves first we have to be willing to assume and accept one hundred percent responsibility. We have to accept that what ever we are, what ever we are getting in life and how so ever we are spending our lives is determined by us and us alone. i.e. we are responsible.
There are two signs of not accepting the responsibility: blaming and complaining. If we are either blaming others or full of complaints about life and whatever life has to offer to us, we are in fact not being very responsible.
Accepting responsibility means, we created our results in life and only we can re-create them. In re-creating we have to face the pain and go through an effort.
Going through this effort nurtures our spirit and grows us mentally. By not accepting our responsibility, we refuse to grow. We show ourselves that we do not think ourselves worthy of growth and nurturing.
We act non-lovingly. We act non-responsibly.
Step to do: Just repeat this to yourself 5 times: No blames, No complaints. And commit to yourself to never blame or complain again in life. Ever!